The excerpt below was taken with permission from Michael Haykin’s book 8 Mulheres de Fé, Faithful Editor.
A little-known magazine, The Panoplist and Missionary Magazine United, has published an file entitled “The Relic of Ms. Edwards,” containing a rare and seemingly authentic account of Sarah’s first Christian experience. According to the editor-in-chief of this magazine, the following paragraphs were extracted – with some verbal modifications, from an article with Ms Sarah Edwards’ letter – dated October 22, 1735.
- “I sought that day the reasons for my hope for my future state.
- And I have no shortage of hopes of being at peace with God.
- About nine years ago.
- I was taken to see my danger of eternal destruction; but I have made the decision to ask for mercy.
- I thought if I ever died.
- It would be at the feet of the Redeemer.
- Words: even if he kills me.
- Will I wait for him? They often came to mind.
- Shortly after that.
- Isaiah chapter 44.
- Verses 4.
- 5.
- And 6 [i].
- Were words that melted my heart.
- They seemed to be God’s call to me.
- And I believe I was empowered by faith to listen to and obey him.
- The following Saturday.
- I took to appreciate Christ’s closeness as the creature’s greatest happiness.
- My soul thirsted for him.
- So that death seemed nothing to me.
- As long as I could be with him.
- Because he was completely adorable and that mentality continued.
- For a moment.
The following winter, more than ever, I understood my own vile state better. In fact, I could say that I hated myself and regretted myself in the dust and ashes. It wasn’t because of the harm sin would bring me, but because it dishonored God. This view of sin had a great propensity to break me and incline me to seek God’s forgiveness. I had great confidence in my love for Christ; and I was not afraid to invoke him, as Peter did, and say to him: “Lord, you know everything; you know I love you ?. He loved Christ for what he was in himself; He loved him in all his offices; I saw my absolute need for him in all his offices; and she thought that she was as willing to be governed by his laws as to be saved by her merits. I found the will to draw closer to God as a father. A way of being saved that empties the soul and exalts God was what attracted me tremendously. The thoughts in my heart were: “What do I have that I have not received?” and “That sets me apart. ” I felt a great love for the people of God; even though they were people that I didn’t like before; however, I felt tender affection and pleasure for them in their company. For the next six months, I had very little fear of death. Christ, as I knew, had conquered death. During this time, I felt so much inner peace and such rest in my soul as I reflected on those things that I cannot express. The vanity of the world was very great in my opinion. It seemed almost impossible that at some point he could be a little worried about anything he might find in this world; because everything was available to God. It was enough to make me endure, with patience and humility, what happened to me. I thought Lamentations 3. 39, “Why then does the living man complain? Complain about each of your own sins? You must order everyone’s silence, even if they come across things so contrary to their way of thinking.
In July 1727 I married and moved from New Haven to Northampton. For a while before I came here, almost all I asked was for God to come with me. Moses’ prayer was very present in my heart. And I hope God did, been with me here.
In the fall, after my arrival, I was worried about the fear of being like listeners on the stony ground, I feared that if she was judged with persecution, she would fall, but God showed me that she could easily make me want to. dies for his cause, if he calls me there; and may I rejoice in the flames by Christ, who strengthens me.
I had the spirit of gloating in God as part of my soul, and my sincere desire was to be able to approach even his court; and for me, it’s worth one more day in your hallways than a thousand elsewhere. I was glad the Lord reigned.
During a period of great anguish, he often said, Who do I have in heaven besides you?And there’s no one on earth who wants to except you. My soul yearns for God, the living God, when will I be before God?
I used to say in my heart: there is joy in believing, I sincerely wanted to emulate christ’s example, with patience, humility, and selflessness.
In this text, Sarah embarks on a typical Puritan reflection on her reasons for believing that she is truly a daughter of God; the fact that, after all, he rejoices in salvation that empties his soul and exalts God was decisive for his peace of mind in relation to the authenticity of his conversion.
After her marriage to Jonathan in 1727, Sarah became very busy with domestic affairs, as the couple had eleven children between 1728 and 1750. Although Jonathan played an important role as their children’s spiritual mentor, much of her was responsible of their education. . . Understandably, the pressure of maternal duties and all the other tasks involved in running a full and busy house weighed heavily on her. To deal with this, Sarah gave herself and all that she was wholeheartedly to God on at least a few different occasions in 1739 and 1740. This altruism? in the Puritan tradition, in the sense of making a personal covenant with God? it will become the basis for extraordinary experiences in late January and early February 1742. Jonathan was away from Northampton for much of this period, on a two-week preaching trip that involved at least eight meetings in Massachusetts and Connecticut. During your absence, other ministers? Most notable among them was Samuel Buell (? 1798), who later settled in East Hampton, Long Island, and whose ordination sermon Edwards preached in 1746. They ascended to the pulpit at Northampton. Sarah was concerned about many things at the time, especially a comment her husband made, just before he went on a preaching trip, that he thought Sarah had failed to some degree when it came to caution in a conversation with whom he had had. Sir. [Chester] Williams ?, a pastor in Hadley and a distant cousin. Sarah regretted not having “a good opinion of my husband. ” Other stressful situations? for example, finances and jealousy for blessing the ministry of others in Northampton, like Buell and Williams. has led some people to suggest that Sarah’s experiences were part of a nervous breakdown. Elisabeth Dodds, for example, describes Sarah becoming a grotesque, crazy talker and quite weak. Edwards, for his part, was convinced that his wife’s experiences represented an authentic encounter with the Triune God and that the stress in his life was God’s way of bringing him to a point of absolute submission to his sweet sovereignty.
[i] Isaiah 44:4-6 and will grow as grass, like willows by streams of water. They will say, I am for the Lord; another will be called by Jacob’s name; the other will write of his hand: I am for the Lord, and by nickname he will take the name of Israel. Thus speaks the Lord, King of Israel, His Redeemer, the Lord of armies: I am the first and I am the last, and outside of me there is no God.