Adultery is devastating. After a case of adultery, the offender must first turn away from sin through repentance before God, but after this repentance, there is another question to answer: Do you have to confess adultery to your spouse?
Sometimes confessing to a wife or husband seems to do more harm than good. I once received a letter from a man saying he had committed adultery years ago, but the love story lasted only a week and he had repented to God and others. The reason he wasn’t sure he was confessing to his wife was that the marriage was already struggling and he was deeply concerned that a bomb like this could end the marriage and harm the children.
- In fact.
- It’s a painful situation.
- However.
- I still believe that the confession of adultery to your spouse is absolutely necessary.
- Here are five reasons:.
Biblically speaking, each spouse has the exclusive right to sexuality of the other. The word? This may sound radical, but that is exactly the word Paul uses in 1 Corinthians 7. 4. It is not an authorization for abuse, but it means that neither husband nor wife has autonomy over their bodies. your spouse, your sin affects you, even if he doesn’t know it. Conjugal union is spiritual and mysterious, as Paul teaches (1:6:16-17). This means that joining with another person is siding against the spouse.
To hide adultery, even if you have repented, is to deceive your spouse about something that is at the heart of your marriage Does he deserve to know?If you do, will you feel a burden of guilt and an incurable shame for the love story?or, worse, you will eventually become a friend of sin and no longer feel ashamed, because by secrecy you have developed a callous heart. The way to avoid this is through confession.
One of the most important reasons to confess your adultery to your spouse is that you must conclude that your husband or wife is more important than the risks you take because of confession. He must recognize his sin; you must tell your spouse as such. Don’t give him any indication that you blame him for his sin. When you confess, don’t raise any other problems with your marriage or previous injuries. This is not the time to talk about these things. You must fully assume your immorality.
Your spouse will feel betrayed and angry. You’ll get the impression that the world doesn’t make sense to him. This is all perfectly natural, because you’ve broken the pact. You sinned against your spouse and broke a trust. Don’t defend yoursings. Don’t make excuses or reasons. Let your spouse express the sadness and anger that come with it.
You can’t expect your spouse to be sad for a few moments and then forgive him. You may feel, as you admit, that a heavy burden has been removed, but this is the first time you’ve heard of it. There must be anguish and an expression of righteous anger from your spouse. Let him do that, then patiently wait for his forgiveness. Don’t think you’re bound by some kind of immediate reconciliation. You will have to spend the rest of your life in your marriage in many ways to rebuild the trust that exists, even if your spouse forgives you. The process of reconciliation must begin with confession, which means it must begin with you.