Hello, Maria [i]!
Again, forgive me for the delay? I really ended up forgetting.
- Well.
- First of all.
- Thank you for all the consideration you’ve shown me.
- But you know I’m not really all that?I don’t even have many failures and sins that I struggle with every day.
- And others I have to fight with more?Anyway.
- I have to admit that I’m far.
- Far from the target.
- On my way like you.
- But in this race.
- Because of my age.
- I’ve already gone through some stages you’re going through now.
You know Mary, I didn’t grow up in a Christian house, in my childhood I had no teaching about salvation in Christ, but if there’s one thing I remember well, it’s that my parents taught me very important moral values like respect. for the elderly, the use of kind words (thank you, leave, hello?), that is, I was brought up. And I, like all children, didn’t like someone telling me what to do:?Say hello! Give him this place to make this lady feel!Respect your elders!??. Many times I cried, I had a “crisis of anger”, I wanted to “get out of this house”, but these teachings, these good manners, were and still are very important to me and to my interpersonal relationships.
However, although I was created with as much love and dedication as possible, these teachings were not enough to save my soul, so I grew well educated, yet without salvation. And until the day the Lord redeemed me, until the day the Spirit of God regenerated me and gave me a new heart?, this happened when I was pregnant with my first child, a few days before I was born. , we were born together, she of the flesh and I of the Spirit.
Of course, having been born again and having his eyes open to gospel truths about eternal damnation and such great salvation, there was no other way out, or any other desire, that would burn more in my heart than to teach my daughter everything I had never learned about God, so that she too could be saved. Growing up (I in the knowledge of the Lord and her physically), was she struggling?everything I learned in her, hoping that if I taught her everything, could she learn, she would be saved?This wish also extended to my other two daughters.
But, like all other mothers in the world, I often lacked wisdom when it comes to dosages, teachings, sometimes I gave too many doses, sometimes too little. I have made many mistakes, I have been right a few times, and it is still today, and it will be until the day the Lord calls me?Indeed, Christian life, as well as physical life, is composed of phases and, over the years, “grow”. Believe me, today, looking at the first steps of my journey as a newly converted mother for the first time, are there many things I regret doing and others that I would do exactly the same?It’s life, made of learning!
The truth of this whole equation is that: mothers make mistakes!With exceptions, no mother is wrong to seek harm to her child, whether Christian or not!In other words, mothers don’t make mistakes because I don’t like it, do we make mistakes in love?Do we make mistakes when we don’t correct?Do we make mistakes even when we correct to the right extent?We make mistakes because we are under the effects of the fall.
We often look at non-Christian mothers and are able to report various errors in their children’s education, the main being the lack of teaching of God’s Word, we consider ourselves better mothers because we teach the Bible. Children will be better, because we have already told them about Christ. We want them to behave like exemplary Christians, and when that happens, we pride ourselves and at the bottom of our hearts we let one go?I’ve taught, did he learn, yes, !!?. But when they do not behave like Christians, when they disobey, when they fall into temptation, when they rebel against an order, when they show their hearts, when they do not win the battle against their sins, we are frustrated and wonder what we are doing. “Where was I wrong?” We suffer, we are distressed, and soon we want to change technique: “Who knows if we apply another theory, another thinker, another philosopher, another theologian?!”
Be aware of??? As we try to produce believing children, do we have confidence in ourselves, our teachings, the techniques we learn, the techniques we apply?To try to get it right, once again we were wrong.
What we must understand is that we cannot achieve a change of heart in our children, it is not us who save them. Our task in this life is to be channels of God’s blessings in their lives, but we are not producers of blessings, we carry them in our bowels, but God is the one who forms them (Psalm 139:13). But it is God who gives life (Ps 91:16). We feed them, but God provides daily support (Matthew 6:11). We take them to the park, to the festivities, but God is the one everywhere (Ps 139: 7-10). We give them medicines, but it is God who gives them health (Ex 23:25). , but God is the one who meets the needs (Mt 6:25-33). We offer teachings, but God is the one who gives wisdom (2:6). We proclaim the Gospel, but is it God who saves (Ephesians 2:8-9)?
So there are unpleasant children from unpleasant countries; there are Christian children of evil parents; there are wicked children of Christian parents; and, by the grace of God, despite the sinful nature of children and parents, there are Christian children of Christian parents (both also saved by grace) !!So what we conclude: that salvation is the result of grace.
Does this mean we don’t have to worry about our children?That we should let them follow their own path, that we should not correct them?Absolutely not!Do all parents have responsibilities to their children and must provide them with food, care, education, counseling, affection?Christian parents, in addition to all this, have been commanded, therefore, to teach them the Word (Dt 6:6-7), to educate them in the truth, to pray for them, to discipline wisely (Hebrews 12:6-7), to love them (Titus 2:4), not to anger them (Ephesians 6:4), to bring them to church so that they may be exposed to the preaching of the Word , use the means of grace. (prayers, Reading the Bible, Communion of Saints, etc. ) to bless them, to proclaim to them the gospel of salvation in Christ (2 Ti. 3:15). But none of us had a responsibility to change our hearts, to bring repentance to him, to attest to him, it is divine work!Regeneration is the work of the Spirit, repentance is the fruit of regeneration, faith is God’s gift.
Well, it’s no wonder that being a mother is a mission (1 Timothy 2:15). It’s not an easy task, it’s hard. She is altruistic because, although we like “hugs”, a mother does not act expecting to be recognized by her children, especially when it comes to immature children, a mother acts for the sake of that child, even if she does not understand it. and even if she is wrong to try, a Christian mother acts in obedient response to God, knowing that in this task she is not alone, she has the God of Jacob as a high refuge, as a strong tower, as a comforter, The Christian mother must count on God’s grace over her life and cry out God’s grace in her son’s life.
Maria, don’t expect your daughter at an early age to understand things that without grace we wouldn’t even understand each other. It does not cover the model of Christianity that we are often not even able to reflect. Don’t set goals so high that they’re unattainable to her, go step by step, according to her growth. Know that she will fail and that she will sin. And when that happens, take him to Christ. Show him who we are: miserable sinners. Show who Christ is: the Sinless Son. Tell him that is why we are saved by him; because he lived a sinless life for us sinners. He lived a life of obedience to God for us disobedient daughters. That we must obey God with gratitude for this love. When you need to correct it, do so after making sure that she has deliberately sinned, right after receiving a warning. Remember that every sin is a mistake, but every mistake is not a sin. Tell her that you love her and that you would not like to have to correct it, but that you will have to do it so that she remembers that sin is wrong and keeps you away from God.
And above all, ask God for wisdom and grace for this mission that will last your whole life on this earth. My dear niece and sister in Christ, I ask God for you the same thing I asked in my daughters’ education: may the Lord bless you in this task, to support you in difficult times. May he rejoice in the small victories, give you wisdom and temperament on this path and grant you the grace to see his daughter at the foot of the cross, saved by Christ.
With love
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[i] Editorial note: Maria is a name we take at random to protect the identity of the true recipient of this letter.