This Wednesday, June 12, Valentine’s Day is celebrated, I was asked to write something about it but the truth is that I am a little helpless, after all I usually write alone (but not always) on topics on which I can find biblical bases, an indication of my formation in the field of hermeneutics and biblical studies.
That’s the problem. The meetings were not part of the culture of the ancient Middle East, where and when the Bible was written; back then and there, the custom was different; marriages used to be arranged by parents; there was a first engagement ceremony in which the two engaged After a while, the marriage itself arrived.
- So.
- Is this a big mistake? Take bible passages that refer to marriage and apply to encounters.
- How to want his girlfriend to be submissive using Ephesians 5:22.
However, even if we do not have specific guidelines in the Bible in reference to this period called courtship, we find general principles that can be applied. I mention three.
1) The need for sexual purity and purity is clearly taught in the Bible. The problem with dating is that it opens the door to physical examination of the bodies of lovers, causing sexual arousal, palpation of the genitals and often sexual intercourse. avoid any situation in which they may be tempted to go ahead with the red light. In 1 Thessaloniki, Paul warns:
For it is God’s will: your sanctification, that you refrain from prostitution; that everyone knows that he has his own body in sanctification and honor, not with a desire for lust, like pagans who do not know God; and that, in this case, no one should offend or defraud his brother; for the Lord, against all these things, as we have clearly warned and testified to them, is the avenger, for God called us not to impurity, but to sanctification (1 Thestes 4:3-7).
Fraud? In the previous passage, you create wishes and expectations that you cannot legally fulfill. Fraud occurs when both are sexually aroused, ready for sex when it cannot be executed, such as fornication. Therefore, a general principle that applies to quotations. is that it must be chaste, pure and without causing impurity. I’m not going to fall into the trap of trying to define what kind of kiss you can and what kind you can’t. I think common sense tells us that when he kisses he starts triggering other things, it’s time to stop.
2) Idolatry consists of putting the groom or girlfriend at the center of life, setting aside God, constant communications, constant and long phone calls, exchanges of messages every 15 minutes, contact through social networks all day . . . all of this ends up becoming an obsession that gives idolatry. The meeting’s not for that. It is a period of intellectual, emotional and spiritual knowledge between the two. Lovers tend to hold on too much to each other as if the other were able to fill the void and need that each of us has. When such a relationship ends, despair occurs. and, not infre sfree selly, suicides. Bride and groom must keep a cautious distance. Such an intense relationship is for marriage, and even in this case, be careful that idolatry does not occur. The Bible is clear: it is the Lord Jesus who must have the first place in our lives, and only in Him must we seek the full satisfaction of our tired, afflicted, and thirsty souls.
3) The delay in getting married? Paul teaches that those who cannot be repressed should marry, because it is better to marry than to burn (1 Corinthians 7:9). Prolonged and endless courtship leads to fornication and sexual impurity. Too late Do they start at 15 and want to get married only when they have a home of their own, permanent work, etc. ?at 30. In this range of 10 to 15 years it is very difficult to remain chaste, virgin and pure, the result is leaks to motels or the back seat of the cars, if not to the room of the parents’ house.
Well, I’ve already written here about sex before marriage, for those who haven’t seen it, here it is:
Shame on being a virgin Suppression of sexual desire Is it bad?Letter to a young evangelical having sex with his girlfriend
1. Avoid risky situations. Don’t spend too much time alone in discreet places, don’t get into caresses.
2. Read the Bible and pray together. Read good books about dating and marriage. Attend services, Sunday school, and other study groups.
3. Network isolate yourself, seek the company of other young people, go out in groups for social programs.
Engage your parents, meet them and listen to their advice
5. Keep the distance from each other. Don’t make your boyfriend a god.
6. Date thinking of getting married and not just for fun. Take meetings seriously. Irresponsible flirting breaks hearts, creates pain and resentment, and leaves a mark on people.
If used as part of the biblical principles of purity and devotion to God, encounters can be a fruitful time to know and prepare for marriage.
One last thing, there are people who would be much happier if they hadn’t married. Celibacy (being single and pure) is a valid biblical choice for life.